FUDGE MAKERS WANTED $10-$15 per hour. Exp. not necessary. Must be able to lift 50 Lb easily. Apply in person to Dave at We Do Wind 188 Albany Trpk. Canton 06019.
Yes I’m aware I missed a day… Yes, I have my reasons… No, I will not mention them now… But yes, they will be explained eventually…
[Music|”Roses” by Outkast]
[Mood|Fat (if that’s a mood… which it isn’t)]
If you go to a specialized store, or any store for that matter, looking for a part and/or assistance please know what you are talking about.
Customer: Hi, my pool is leaking out of the side.
Me: Uhhh, OK. Is it leaking at the bottom, a seam on the walls, or a fitting?
Customer: I don’t know, one of the panels is wet.
Me: You’re gonna need to help me a little more than that, ma’am.
(Customer walks over to wall of unions, ball valves, skimmer fittings, etc.)
Customer: It’s coming from this piece. (points to a 1 1/2″ union)
Me: Good, now where on the piece is it leaking?
Customer: The whole thing.
Me: Well, to replace the whole thing, you’d have to drain the pool.
Customer: Oh. It’s the round thing. (everything on a union is round)
Me: Can you be a little more specific.
Customer: The part that plugs into the hose.
Me: Which end?
Customer: I told you, I don’t know, there’s water everywhere.
Me: Well you could go home, and then find out which size, and come back, and I’ll tell you exactly what to do.
Customer: (waits for a moment, contemplates the whole driving back thing, realizes she’s too lazy for that, randomly picks a side) This side.
Me: OK, this is what you are looking for then. (I hand her a valve collar)
Customer: Thank you, now how do you put this on.
(Me spends 20 minutes explaining what to do, customer leaves, comes back two hours later)
Customer: You sold me the wrong part, it’s a different part, one that’s rounded and has threads. (95% of all parts are rounded and have threads)
(I sigh and the whole process begins anew)
Sadly, she’s not the first customer that has done that to me… Just the first to do it multiple times in one day.
[Music|”Walk, Idiot, Walk” by The Hives]
[Mood|Relaxed]
I believe it’s time, time for another streak della posting… Maybe that’ll motivate me some more.
And post #1 of streak #3 is upon us.
Here are some NEW searches that have landed readers on this hallowed domain…
“72 vestal virgins and suicide bombers”
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“ozzie osbourne take me out to the ballgame audio”
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Yup, I’m just as lost as you…
I’ll TRY posting more frequently…
Last three days have been nothing special… Work, then bowl badly after work. Purchased the Mojo and the Spell for $60 shipped yesterday, am trying to acquire a new set of golf clubs this weekend, umpired the championship game for TLL yesterday with out any major screwups, and was offered a return job at Merit Pools next summer.
I know, boring life, tell me about it…
What do you want to know about me?
Grad party was Sunday, it was fun. Starting to hit home more and more that, “Hey, I’m going to college in sixty days.” Good though, because I am at one of those excited “Hey, I’m going to college in sixty days!” peaks. I haven’t started reading Kafka for CU orientation yet. Work is work. Not bad, not fun, somewhere in between. Money is always good though, and I probably would be doing absolutely nothing else if I wasn’t doing it anyways. “Avenue Q” on July 24th, Boston Red Sox vs. Toronto Blue Jays on August 17th. Funtabulous. Hopefully getting the new set of Tour Ti’s this weekend to acquire my first new golf set in nearly ten years. Backed off on buying the Visionary bowling arsenal for financial reasons, and the fact that I’m still having a little trouble with my delivery, etc. that should be worked out first before blowing $600. Looking at laptops online, none coming with my package of DVD-R and good graphics card. Stupid laptops, do what I want you to do. Might have to suffer without one or the other. Wavering between heavy laptop with big screen and fancy things or smaller, lighter laptop that’s more mo-bile. Also need to make progress with the getting of the cellular phone all to myself. Huzzah for cellularness.
And that’s it, work tomorrow, sleep now.
NOTE: In an effort to thwart Google… my nickname today is… NIKOLOV!
So, you haven’t heard from me lately… Well here’s your lowdown.
Friday, prom. It was great to hang out with all my friends, but the whole idea of prom was vastly overhyped (gee, and I this was the argument I used when I tried to talk myself into NOT going). It was somewhere in the middle, at times it was fairly memorable/amusing/emotional/hilarious/etc. but at other times it just kind of dragged on. Thank God for having some people around me who could still act like jackasses in tuxes and long, frilly, amazingly poofy, dresses… That and the fact I got to razz on Logan didn’t hurt at all.
Saturday, mainly nothingness. Slept until noon, did some misc. tasks, Cornell forms, etc.
Sunday, the big graduation! It was fun, but high school had to mercifully come to an end sometime. And it finally did on Sunday. No more classes, no more terrible lunches, or boneheaded scheduling moves… no more incompetent teachers, guidance counselors, administrators… even janitors. Sweet, sweet freedom. The ceremony was nice, albeit a tad long, and we didn’t have the world’s greatest speaker. (The guy who shares his name with hockey’s #77). I at times earlier this year worried whether I would lament graduation too much… That was obviously before I got accepted to colleges, and realized my life was OUTSIDE of Torrington. I was giddy as a giraffe eating a green grapefruit. Why I felt the need to throw that weird metaphorical alliteration in there, I have no clue.
Sunday night into Monday, we got to attend PG. Project Graduation that is. Another good time, a little overblown compared to what it really ended up being, but I think everyone had a good time. Last time to hang out with friends, last time to shoot some hoops together, or sing karaoke, or get your ass handed to you at foosball by Kris… It’ll probably turn out as one of those things you remember because it was during an important time, but one that you can’t really draw details from because it really wasn’t THAT important.
Monday, Nikolov gets day off!
Tuesday, Nikolov goes back to work, work sucks, goes bowling, bowling sucks.
Wednesday, Nikolov goes back to work again, work sucks, goes bowling because he needs to sub for REGGIE DAVIS, turns in a “meh” performance on the sport shot… Though he did obliterate Schmidday with his 391 performance.
And finally… yesterday… dentist (*sigh* stupid wisdom teeth), MORE work, then my new favorite thing to do in the world… umpiring… Me and Little Grossi combined to blow a home run (we called it a ground rule double), a couple fair/foul balls off certain bases, and then APPARENTLY my strike zone was “inconsistent” but the coach told Grossi, and not me to my face… I’m happy his team lost. That and the fact the team that one of “whiny coach” was the one we kinda screwed over with the home run call… So in other words, we didn’t blow either game fully, which I guess is the sole purpose of umpiring in Little League here in Torrington.
That brings us to Friday, where I will be going to work in ohhh, 20 minutes or so. Stupid work. Forgive my terrible grammar, lack of sarcasm and wit, lack on ANY intellectual writing, etc. I’m not a morning person.
EDITED thanks to the blasted Unicode character set…
A couple of people had this in their blogs, so what the hell… You all missed me anyways…
| How to make a czar |
| Ingredients: 1 part jealousy 5 parts ambition 3 parts leadership |
| Method: Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little fitness if desired! |
Since I’m too lazy to write anything meaningful, insightful, exciting, or just plain nostalgic for graduation, I borrowed this little doozy from Eric Schulman which was made into a graduation speech and delivered by Trina Ruhland , 2003 valedictorian of D’Evelyn High School (And now tweaked a bit to reflect THS)… Enjoy!
“The History of the Universe in 200 words or less…”
Quantum fluctuation. Inflation. Expansion. BIG BANG! Dark energy. Dark matter. Ordinary matter. Quarks. Strong nuclear interaction. Particle-antiparticle annihilation. Hydrogen and helium production. Density perturbations. Recombination. Blackbody radiation. Local contraction. Galaxy formation. Contraction. Compression. Hydrogen fusion. Massive star formation. Element formation. Core contraction and implosion. Supernova explosion. Element recycling. Cloud formation. Star formation. Sun formation. Planet formation. Earth. Crust solidification. Comet bombardment. Water condensation. Oceans. Organic chemistry. Polymerization. RNA. Protein. Life. Prokaryotes. Eukaryotes. Photosynthesis. Mutation. Natural selection. Evolution. Cell differentiation. Sexual reproduction. Fossilization. Land exploration! Pre-Cambrian explosion. Dinosaur extinction. Mammal expansion. Glaciers. Homo Sapiens manifestation! Animal domestication. Food surplus production. Language. Civilization. Writing. Innovation. Religion. Warring nations. Empire creation and destruction. Newton and gravitation. Industrial revolution. Exploration. Colonization. Taxation without representation. Revolution. Constitution! Election. Westward expansion. Industrialization. Rebellion. Emancipation proclamation. Invention. Mass production. Urbanization. Immigration. World war. Fission explosions. United Nations. Space exploration. Assassinations. Lunar excursions. Resignation. Computerization. 295 Births. Education reformation. World Trade Organization. Terrorism. Internet expansion. World-Wide Web creation. Stock market inflation. Elementary education. T-Townation. Liberal arts education. Work. Friendship. Labor. Athletics. Toil. Academics. Homework. Finals. Anticipation. Graduation!
And what would anything important in our lives be without a Karthik sighting…
“To the THS Class of 2004: Your graduation is not a celebration of 4 great years. It is instead the culmination of the magical synergy of dumb luck and the aiding of natural selection being outlawed that has allowed you to survive this long. And remember… jubilant noise is not permitted until -after- the ceremony, outside. ”
“It’s not the walls that make the memories, it’s the personalities inside those walls…” - Me (I’m gonna write motivational quotes for a living…)
I can’t believe it’s over. One more day to be considered a senior in high school. What we’ve been waiting, hoping, dreaming for for the last eighteen years is here. The best 4 year run of our life OFFICIALLY ends tomorrow!
So let’s stand up, throw our caps, and give one last hurrah to the TORRINGTON HIGH SENIOR CLASS OF 2004!
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