Giant Hand pulls groin.

30 11 2004

^^The title of this post is lifted directly from Yahoo.^^

News
Giants defensive tackle Norman Hand strained his groin in the third quarter of Sunday’s game against the Eagles and did not return to the game. “I didn’t know big guys had groins,” he told Newsday. “I’m finding out today that I actually have one.” Hand hopes his sore groin won’t keep him from playing the ‘Skins next Sunday.

Views
We’ll check back with Hand throughout the practice week to see if he’ll be ready for the Redskins’ game.




This is what’s wrong with the world…

16 11 2004

Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese on eBay…

eBay Grilled Cheese - The Virgin Mary

The description:
“You are viewing an extroidinary out of this world item!! I made this sandwich 10 years ago, when I took a bite out of it, I saw a face looking up at me, It was Virgin Mary starring back at me, I was in total shock, I would like to point out there is no mold or disingration, The item has not been preserved or anything, It has been keep in a plastic case, not a special one that seals out air or potiental mold or bacteria, it is like a miracle, It has just preserved itself which in itself I consider a miracle, people ask me if I have had blessings since she has been in my home, I do feel I have, I have won $70,000 (total) on different occasions at the casino near by my house, I can show the recipts to the high bidder if they are interested, I would like all people to know that I do believe that this is the Virgin Mary Mother Of God, That is my solem belief, but you are free to believe that she is whomever you like, I am not scamming anyone, I would like all potinetal bidders to know that this has gained alot of attention from media personell around the country, On Tuesday November 16, 2004 the Miami Herald will feature a story in thier paper on this phenomon, Also Today which is November 15, 2004 The story of The Virgin Mary In The Grilled Cheese will be aired on Channel 4 News here in South Florida, The story has been told nationwide on radio stations ect. I also would like all onlookers to understand why I am choosing to keep the high bidders ID private, I listed this once before and had all kinds of emails some were nice and funny comments but many were cruel intended, and vindictive, I ignored them but, I do not wish to subject potiental buyers to this form of invasion, The last time this was listed there were over 80,000 viewers, Like I said I recieved alot of emails that were down right cruel intended, I do not care I will not read them anyhow, but you should not waste your time being vindictive, I am asking that only serious questions about the item be emailed to me, not jokes or ridiclous comments, If you have a genuine question please do feel free to email, I am not scamming anyone I am selling this item proivided that there is a serious bid with a payment, SERIOUS BIDDERS ONLY! DO NOT BID IF YOU INTEND TO RETRACT THE BID OR FOOL AROUND, THERE IS NO RESERVE ON THIS AUCTION!! I AM STARTING IT OUT AT THE BOTTOM LINE PRICE THAT I INTEND TO SELL THIS ITEM FOR!!

Uh, no. No. No. These people should not be allowed to touch a computer let alone utilize eBay for this purpose. Looks like that barbeque wing that I thought looked like Buddha is gonna be a hot item tomorrow.

The thing that boggles me the most is if this person TRULY believes in God and the Virgin Mary, and that this cheese sandwich has brought her good blessings over the last ten years, then why the hell would you degrade yourself to sell it. You’re a fool woman.




A 1500 page “consise” anthology…

13 11 2004

Quote of the week - “My wife is going to kill me. You know how many window treatments you can buy with this?” - Colts punter Hunter Smith after getting fined for a helmet-to-helmet hit; the first punter ever to be fined for doing so in NFL history.

So I think I’ve finally kicked both the flu and the subsequent sinus infection. I’m not dying anymore. Cool. Also, even if the daily recommended amount of acetaminophen is 1000 mg, you won’t die if you take 3600. Well maybe you will, it’s probably still not a good idea.

Hey did you hear who won the World Series this year?
-That’s right. The Red Sox. Sorry, I never get tired of hearing myself say that.




Ride the roller coaster of life…

8 11 2004

Well last week didn’t go well Cornell-wise. I got a C-/D on my physics prelim. Not good. Surprisingly better than I thought, seeing as I thought I mustered a 25/100, but I only fell about 10 points short of the median. Unlike the first physics prelim where I knew the material, and just royally fucked up some questions(Oh, constant velocity…), this prelim I was just boned. Didn’t study the right materials. Missed sections and lecture due to flu. Didn’t garner partial credit. Completely flopped multiple choice. That kind of stuff. So my grades here are far from shining with only finals to go. Astronomy I’m carrying an A-/B+ so that’s not bad. FWS (it’s just writing) I think I’m happily around a B or B-, Calculus I’m B-/C+ but I haven’t done some stuff for section which could hurt in the long run, and physics I’m around C, C-, D. Not cool. My study habits weren’t ready for this school. So now it looks like I’ll have to change that or it’s hello UConn (OK, maybe not that bad, but at least hello Boston U. or Clarkson).

Beer night* was a complete failure due to a surprisingly lack of beer and busses. Did manage to right a wrong by beating Cho at beer pong after that Asian muthafucker told me he would take me out… Good for him.

Rest of the weekend was rather uneventful. I actually scared myself into doing some work, due to my lack of, well, doing well. Saturday night was spent learning infinite series and mass density of galaxies and angular momentum.

Bowling confidence is at a new high. Averaging over 200 suddenly with only ONE ball. Just purchased a ball spinner, some polish, sandpaper, scotch-brites with my poker winnings, so we’ll see how much of an advantage that gives me. Hopefully this will allow me to purchase crap balls for cheap, resurface them, and bake/bleed/heat/rejuvinate them and put together a cost-effective, performance arsenal. Toying around with the idea of trying to qualify for some PBA regionals in the spring if Cornell funds my entry fee as a “varsity sport.”

Ugh, these “recap” posts of mine always suck. Never ask me how my life is again. Oh wait, you didn’t. Fuck it dude, let’s go bowling.

* - The origin of the term “beer night”
Jibben: What’s tonight?
Me: Uh… Tuesday night?
Jibben: What else?
Me: Uh… ten-dollar Tuesday?
Jibben: …and….
Me: Uh, I give up, what?
Jibben: BEEER NIGHT!




This is kind of interesting…

4 11 2004

(I’d use a piece of paper to pull down line by line so you don’t see what’s below it… more effective…)

How much is:

1 + 5?

3 + 3?

4 + 2?

5 + 1?

Repeat the number 6 in your head as fast as possible
for 15 seconds.

FAST!!! THINK OF A VEGETABLE!

Think, think…

Click below to have your mind read…

Read the rest of this entry »




Four more years?

3 11 2004

Four?
More?
Years?

Good God, the apocalypse is nigh…